VULGAR, puerile and relentlessly potty-mouthed – and those are the chief selling points of Your Highness – David Gordon Green's olde worlde tale of good versus evil is as cheerless and charmless as they come.

Co-written by leading man Danny McBride and Ben Best, this crass comedy begs obvious comparisons with the 1987 cult classic The Princess Bride by poking fun at fairytales.

Certainly, there are no happy ever afters for us, having to endure a slurry of obscenities that leaves us craving a shower to wash off the filth as soon as we leave the cinema.

Prince Thadeous (McBride) has always laboured in the shadow of his handsome and gallant brother, Prince Fabious (James Franco), who is, unsurprisingly, the favourite of their father (Charles Dance) and the lusty maidens of the realm.

Fabious returns from a quest with beautiful Belladonna (Zooey Deschanel) on his arm, who he intends to marry.

Oh woe! Dastardly sorcerer Leezar (Justin Theroux) kidnaps the bride-to-be and spirits her away to his castle lair.

Distraught groom-to-be Fabious gives chase with loyal lieges Boremont (Damian Lewis) and Julie (Toby Jones), plus Thadeous begrudgingly in tow.

The brothers encounter weird and wonderful characters along the way including sexy warrior Isabel (Natalie Portman), who is unfathomably attracted to overweight and clumsy Thadeous.

McBride and Franco don't generate any on-screen chemistry.

Portman employs all of her acting skills to hide the revulsion that Isabel would surely feel for Thadeous.

A horse and carriage chase through a forest is the only sequence of any note for director Green, who fails miserably to repeat the success of the endearing Pineapple Express.