OF all the tragic events that can happen in life, surely one of the worst is losing a child.

And when that child is a baby, or the baby is stillborn, it invokes an incredibly strange type of grief, grief for a life that will never start.

Lawyer Amy Abrams gave an interview to the Independent a few years ago, after losing her baby at 38 weeks pregnant. She had not felt her baby move for some time before doctors confirmed her child had no heartbeat.

She was given a concoction of drugs to induce labour, something she described as ‘like being at the Dignitas clinic’ and had to give birth to a child that would not be born alive.

“I’ve not just lost a baby,” she said. “I’ve lost a toddler, a schoolgirl, a teenager and an adult daughter. A whole potential life has gone. I’ll never be able to swarm Arella with the love I had ready to give her.

“The only tangible reminders I have left are pictures, a lock of her hair as well as her foot and handprints. These are – and always will be – my most treasured possessions.”

And Amy feels strongly that there needs to be more awareness of stillbirth and neonatal deaths.

“Some people don’t know what to say to me: stillbirth is such a taboo. And when people say nothing? That hurts the most,” she says. “We can talk about cot death but not about stillbirth. My midwife gave me a booklet on preventing cot death, yet stillbirth is 10 times more common.

“The problem is that we can’t educate mothers about stillbirth as we have no answers. No-one knows the warning signs to look out for.”

This Friday will signal the start of baby loss awareness week, an opportunity for families to acknowledge and remember precious babies they’ve lost.

Until recently I had not been aware that Chester had a branch of SANDS (Stillbirth and Neonatal Death Charity) which is run by three local volunteers who are also bereaved mothers.

Emma Savage and Claire Whiteside helped set up the group in early 2013 following the loss of Emma’s daughter Lucy in March 2010 and Claire’s daughter Alyssa in September 2010.

Both women felt they wanted to meet other families who had experienced the loss of a baby. Newest member Louise Foulkes joined the committee after attending the Sands group following the loss of her son Riley in October 2012 and together as Chester Sands, they try to offer support to anyone affected by the death of a baby in Chester and the surrounding areas including Ellesmere Port, Neston, Frodsham and Helsby, Northwich, Winsford and Malpas.

Claire said: “We as a group aim to support bereaved parents by providing a monthly support group, giving the opportunity for bereaved parents to meet other bereaved parents and talk to others who are on a similar journey, and by providing practical help and advice when a baby dies, including a variety of different booklets and other publications.

“There are also booklets that can be downloaded from the Sands website at www.uk-sands.org/resources/parents-family-friends/booklets-leaflets-certificates .”

The charity also provides information and support leaflets to all bereaved parents on the labour ward at the Countess of Chester Hospital and through their fundraising, they have recently managed to donate a cold cot to the hospital as well as Joshua’s Boxes – memory boxes that aim to give comfort to the grieving parents who have lost babies.

How to get involved with SANDS

The group meets on the last Wednesday of every month in a private room at All Saints Church Centre in Hoole, and is very informal. They also organise social events where families can meet others.

You can find out more about Chester Sands group by contacting them on 07570 054154, emailing chester.sands@aol.co.uk or via the Facebook page.

The facts on baby deaths

In 2013, more than 5,700 babies died just before, during or soon after birth – over 100 babies each week.

Three in every 10 stillbirths happen at term (after 37 weeks gestation), the age when a baby is preparing to start life outside the womb.

SANDS is a national charity which tries to support anyone who has been affected by the death of a baby before, during or shortly after birth.

It is there to offer emotional support and information for parents, grandparents, siblings, children, families and friends, health professionals and others.

After decades of stagnation, the UK’s stillbirth rate is starting to fall but it still remains higher than other comparable countries and much more can and should be done.

Contrary to common perception, major congenital anomalies (birth defects) account for fewer than 10% of stillbirths. It is unclear what causes stillbirths, more funding is needed to research into this.

Neonatal deaths refer to the death of a baby within the first four weeks of life. In the UK in 2013, 1,590 babies died within the first week of their lives, and another 494 died within the next three weeks.

The number of babies who die in the neonatal period (the first 28 days) has fallen markedly over the last decade, largely because of advances in medical knowledge and clinical care.

But in 2013, it remained the case that one in 370 babies died in the first four weeks of life in the UK.

Many babies who die within the first four weeks of life have a congenital disorder or were born prematurely. In the remainder of cases the cause is unknown or due to potentially avoidable issues that have originated in pregnancy and during labour.

There is so much support out there, especially on the SANDS website www.uk-sands.org , which also contains information leaflets of all aspects of coping with the death of a baby.